8:51 AM

My favorite way to start the day, if I can manage to get up in time, involves going to the gym and simultaneously watching 10 closed captioned TVs while listening to NPR on my armband radio. I like to think that it's waking up my brain, but in reality, it's probably just decreasing my attention span. At any rate, this was one of those happy mornings. I learned about blogging in Iran, read transcripts of Jon Benet's killer's phone conversations, caught up on baseball standings, and learned what to expect to at the Minnesota State Fair this weekend (things on sticks).

In the midst of all this, the CBS morning show was having a segment on "landing a man" with some apparent authority on the subject. I couldn't hear what she was saying, but the important tips were helpfully flashed on the screen.

1. Keep phone conversations simple
2. Don't over accessorize
3. Don't be a picky eater
4. Never kiss him on your first date

Thank goodness I saw this before it was too late. I used to think that my lack of committed relationship had to do with not yet finding the right person. Now I realize that I've probably been overstimulating those poor guys I've dated with complex ideas and flashy earrings, and driving them away with my requests for wheat bread at restaurants and slutty behavior.

As if the closed-captioned TV gods could sense my irritation at this segment, the gym's music video channel began playing Bohemian Rhapsody with clips from Wayne's World. Guess it's going to be an okay day after all.


9:51 AM

How much emphasis is it appropriate to put on place when making life decisions? Let me elaborate, or at least explain why I'm asking. A couple days ago, I saw a posting for my dream job - something combining economic justice, environmental protection, living in Madison, and hugging Pound Puppies. I'm already scheduled to be going to school when this job would start, but hey, I told myself, it's my dream job. I can't not apply. I've been having second thoughts about finishing the PhD anyway. Plus, due to low undergrad econ enrollment (where are all those business major kids I always complain about?), I'll be making around $7000 next year TAing. So I went back to the site where I saw the dream job posted and found another post describing a position that, if not the stuff of my dreams, at least sounded like something I could do. This may come as a surprise, but an MA in Environmental Politics did not leave me as eminently qualified for real-world jobs as I might have hoped. Long story short, I'm about to apply for a pretty okay job and potentially never finish the PhD because I can't let go of the idea of living in Madison. There are lots of other little (and big) considerations, but that's the gist of it. Is this crazy talk?


5:06 PM

College was great and all, but I wish I had gone during the awesome-commencement-speaker era and not the lame-ass/implicated-in-latin-american-scandal-commencement-speaker era. Does anybody still read this blog? And if you do, were you at the Knox graduation this year? Did Steven Colbert really ad lib about Umberto Eco like it says in the transcript? That guy is awesome. AWESOME!

So I tried really hard to be a big girl and find a summer job for myself here in Massachusetts, but I have given up and reserved a seat on the next flight to Minnesota. Okay, maybe it's not the next flight, but probably the flight after the next flight, or the one after that. Anyway, I'm going home tomorrow. I haven't spent three months with my parents in quite a while. Strangely, I'm looking forward to it. Primarily because my mom just covered the entire upstairs of our house in linolium, (or the floors, anyway), and it will facilitate the pretend ballet dancing I like to do at home and in grocery stores. I still don't have a job, though, so if anyone has any connections with people in the Twin Cities who want to hire pretend ballet dancers, please contact me. I can spin around on one foot almost three times. Thank you.


6:58 PM

If you've known me at any time since 1986, you've probably heard me talk about how my *real* dream is to be in a band. Well, I saw a posting on Craigslist for a "feamle keyboardist" for an indie-pop group this week and thought, what the heck, I'll reply. I'd been emailing the drummer back and forth for a couple days, the whole while thinking a) i have no idea how to play music that's not on a page in front of me and b) i bet it's a group of 18-year-olds anyway and so my lack of skills will make little difference. Just out of curiousity, though, I googled the guy I had been writing to, and turns out, he was in a band that opened for (among others) Alice Cooper and Broken Social Scene. Now, I'm not sure what kind of outfit opens for both Alice Cooper and BSS, but I wouldn't mind finding out. I'm also not sure what is going to become of my dream of being in a band, since I told the guy I don't really "play by ear." I will keep you posted. Or maybe you'll just have to wait until you go to a New Pornographers or Guns 'n' Roses concert and see me in the opening band.


11:07 PM

I had this great plan when I started grad school that I was going to allot myself 40 normal working hours every week to go to classes and do homework, and have evenings and weekends free. I figured there was no way I would have more than that much work to do, and I have a decent amount of will power when I want to. But it just never happened, no matter how hard I tried. I chalked it up to lack of self-discipline, but more than that, I think my brain just cannot handle 8 hours of concentrated thinking every day. Is that just a bad excuse? Am I really just lazy? Am I stringing together questions directed at no one in particular because I have watched too much Sex and the City in the last month?

I have not suffered from anything like mental exhaustion lately, thankfully. Today, my parents and I went to the 2006 US Pond Hockey Championships. We didn't actually watch any games (it was championship day and there weren't any going on when we got there) but we did walk around on a big frozen lake in Minneapolis for a while. And I fantasized about living in a condo on that lake. I realized that I do that just about everywhere I go. I'm a little obsessed with the thought of living in a nice apartment/condo, but only superficially. I see one from the outside with a nice exterior and/or cool name and make a mental note that I could live there if I ever end up in the area and have lots of money.

I'm not likely to have lots of money any time soon, but the longer I stay in Minnesota, the more I think I could move back here someday. In a large condo on the lake, of course.


2:19 PM

While snowshoeing around my house today, it occurred to me that being at home is sort of like being at a winter-themed spa. I eat healthy food, do some sort of winter sport and yoga pretty much every day, and read. And usually when I come home, my dad treats me to a massage at the massage school. All I'm missing is a fluffy white robe and a face mask.

I don't have much experience with it yet, but I have a feeling 2006 is going to be the best year ever. It's not as pleasantly palindromey as 2002 or inclusive of my lucky number as 2003, but so far, it feels good.


7:39 PM

According to Wired, hydrogen inventions aren't going to save the world any time soon:

"Eighty percent or more of the ideas that come directly to us violate the laws of physics," says Patrick Serfass, a spokesman for the National Hydrogen Association.

At least now I know what Dan's doing when he's not building snowmen...